Wednesday, May 29, 2013

I hate pharmaceutical reps!

Of course, today our Merial rep bring a dozen of the most delish looking doughnuts to work... I told a co worker how I wanted the chocolate one and the skinny ho (i mean that affectionately) says "well, maybe you can cut it up in tiny bites and slowly eat it." I tried to explain its not only that its "bread" but its a freakin doughnut!!!! I guess she thought she was being helpful...

I am getting tired of eating the same food. I want a hot dog, taco or salad soooo bad!!!

The skinny co worker told me to go to Wendy's and get a small Frosty. I don't think she understands the concept!

My husband is down 14lbs, I am so proud of him!!

I hope to be at 272 by Friday...I think that will be my official Weigh in day. Or maybe Monday, I always weigh less on Mondays....we will see.

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Everyday weigh in :(

Most bloggers out there have a specific day they weigh in every week. I weigh in everyday. My GYN said this is good idea, and she does too, that way she can look back on the day and say "okay, I should change this" or whatever. 

As of this morning, I weigh 274.4lbs. My starting weight was 298.6lbs. A loss of 24.2lbs. 

Overall, pretty good I think. 

I eat a variety of foods and nothing makes me sick. Pasta, rice, potatoes....all that sort of stuff. I have done shredded chicken and some shrimp. All good.

Willie & I are exercising every chance we get, which is good. He is down about 10lbs. He is frustrated I am losing a lot quicker...but I did have surgery! Crazy man.

All in all going pretty good. 

Friday, May 24, 2013

1st Follow Up

After my incident with air in the band last week, the surgeon wanted to see me Wednesday instead of next week. My appointment was at 2:30pm. I did not get seen until 5:20pm. It was horrible! But apparently they had to rush a patient into the hospital, the reason for the delay. I left about 5:45.

Incisions look great. 
Losing weight at a good pace.
I can have smoothies!
I can have my Tea with Splenda!
All in all, pretty good. 
I did tell him I was concerned since I couldn't handle a little air in my band, how am I going to handle my first fill? He said with time it would be fine.
Next appointment June 19th. 

I am eating okay. Mashed potatoes, egg salad, chicken salad, potato salad, soup, jello, sugar free fudge pops, jello. 

I really want salad. He said that wouldn't be until week 6 or 7. 

I really want cereal. I don't know why.


Tuesday, May 21, 2013

A little better

Last week, was an awful week.

I was not handling my band and new life very well. I was hurting so much and couldn't eat, couldn't drink, couldn't sleep, couldn't do anything at all. I was waking up in horrible pain, and I could feel so much pressure in my chest and stomach. I was truly regretting my decision.

Friday morning I called the surgeon's office. Lori told me that complaints I was having she had not heard of, so she had Dr. Dewitt call me between surgeries. He did. He wanted to see me. I went to his office and waited about an hour for him to finish surgery. He put me under the fluoroscope. He said my band looked fine, right position, but he was concerned there may be fluid or air trapped in the band. 

There was air. He numbed my stomach, and took the air out. 

I could breath again!!!

He told me to take the weekend off and rest. Well, that didn't happen because I had to work Friday night at my parents restaurant, but I tried. I feel a lot better.

Now its horrible gas pains, and before I couldn't feel my port, now I do and its freaking me out.

But I am much better than last week. 

I am eating mashed potatoes, oatmeal, potato salad, chicken salad, pudding, popsicles. 

I get full without all the pain.

I have not been sick once. After reading some other bloggers about most food making them sick, I was really concerned, but since the surgery I have not once had a problem with it. 

Dr. Dewitt wants to see me again Wednesday. I know I won't get a fill yet, but will I be able to handle a fill if the air bothered me?

When can I have salad? I want one so bad. 

Even though I am not BFF's with my band yet, I am okay with it right now. I cried so much last week. 

BTW: I am down 20.4lbs in two weeks since pre-op diet. pretty good I guess. 

Thursday, May 16, 2013

Regret

I am really starting to regret this decision. 

I feel miserable all the time. I can't sleep.

I am hardly eating, and I have gained a pound. 

I hate UNJURY chicken protein.

I hate trying to make time to take vitamins.

I really think I shouldn't have done.

How is it that the top of my stomach feels full but my stomach still has horrible hunger pains!?!

I woke my husband up at 4am crying because I want it gone.

My mom said it will be worth it.


I wish right now I hadn't done this.

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

4 days post op

The morning of surgery was....challenging.

1. My husband lost his wallet.
2. I forgot to pack my bag the night before in case I had to stay overnight.
3. I was still having regrets, and not wanting to do it.
4. When we arrived at one day surgery I realized I forgot to put my motion sickness on the back of my ear as instructed.

We arrived about 5:30 am. I was still dealing with the drinking of Magnesium from the day before. My husband is freaking because he thinks he forgot his wallet in a classroom the day before. About 7:15am, they call me back. I changed and the surgical nurse came and tried to put an IV in. Didn't work...and it hurt soooooo bad. I was crying. The anesthesia nurse came in and did it in one shot. But I was still crying. They went and got my mom to be with me a moment. My surgeon came in, told me to stop crying and that everything was going to be okay. Then my mom went to get Willie. Willie was upset that when they called me back, he was outside calling about his wallet. He stayed with me until about 9:30 when they wheeled me back. I was still crying. I remember the other nurse giving me something to relax in the elevator. I remember being in the OR, and then nothing until I woke up in recovery freaking out, saying I couldn't breathe. It was horrible. Luckily, I had a very nice recovery nurse, Agnes. She was so sweet, the little I remember. After some period of time, she wheeled me to a room. I remember her telling my new nurse, Brittany "Take care of my  beautiful child. I can't wait to see her in a few months. She is going to be a knockout with that beautiful hair and eyes." Brittany was also very sweet.
My mom left about 1:30pm, and my husband of course stayed the rest of the day, fielding calls from relatives and helping me. About 2:45pm, Dr. Dewitt came in, asked how I was doing. I was doing okay actually. No vomiting or even wanting to. I was in pain and had gas pain. I have 4 incisions. The only one that hurts is the biggest one, and I think that is where my port is. Dr. Dewitt said as soon as I did 8 laps I could go. And I did. By 6:30 I was ready to go. I was very impressed by all the hospital staff. 
We went by the pharmacy, got my scripts and went home. I got in the recliner because I couldn't' get on my sides. My husband slept on the couch beside me. All weekend he was very sweet and helpful, and never left my side. Over the weekend I got down maybe 2 popsicles and 1 jello and lots of water. Monday I had oatmeal, soup and mashed potatoes. All of which I kept down and did great. 
Last night, I had a lot of gas pains. I can sleep in the bed now. Still hurts to move around though. When I finally got good and comfortable it was time to wake up and go to work. Yes, I went to work. We don't have a large staff here, so when I am not here, that means one other person is having to work 12 hours. I think I may leave a 12, just because I am really uncomfortable. I have scheduled my follow up for May 29th.

I don't know how I feel about this. I am tired of the gas pains. I am down 18lbs. I could feel it when I put on my scrub pants this morning. I don't know, but I definitely do not want to eat. We will see in a couple of weeks I guess.

Thursday, May 9, 2013

24 hours left...and I feel horrible

This whole not eating real food is a bummer. I have read other blogs and they don't seem to have as big a deal about it, like I have. I hate it. I feel horrible!!!!!!!!!! I want to eat sooooo bad! I love food. I love eating food. And, honestly, I am a little depressed about not being able to do that. I just have to remind myself that I rather be thinner.

Yesterday they did our pre-admission. They went over our history, we met with the anesthesiologist, they took blood, we had another nutrition class, met with the surgeon, met with Lori who gave me what time to be there, and met with another lady that gave me my scripts and my eat like a kid card.

Can I say that I am really not excited anymore? because I am really not. And I hate that. 

I sat and talked with my husband and cried. He said I can't some all this way and chicken out. 

I know that. 

I am going to do it, but I am not happy about it.

Yesterday, they had a chance for us to buy some of the Unjury Chicken flavored, which when I tasted it, was very good. Other bloggers have read about it, so I was excited about it. Well, they were sold out by the time I got to buy some. They gave me samples instead, which is fine. When I got home, I made myself some. It was good, but ever since then I have been real sick feeling. I don't know if it is just from being hungry or what, but I don't want anymore. 

I have lost 12lbs. I sat in bed thinking, maybe I shouldn't have it, and I can lose it on my own. But, if i had the chance I would got food last night that was healthy. Chik Fil A? Pizza? Captain D's? Any real food. 

but, here we go.....

6am tomorrow. I am dreading it. I hope this is normal. 

  

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

A very hard day.

I am down to 290.4. Sounds good, right?

I am miserable and hungry. Some bloggers had to do a two week liquid diet, and I do not know how y'all made it. My doctor had me start on Friday just protein, and then tomorrow I start the liquid only. For a food addict, this is so hard. I wanted pizza soooooooo bad yesterday. Or a sandwich. Either would be fine.
My husband said "google what happens if you cheat". I did. It convinced me not to.
I stopped at Publix after class and bought some already cooked shrimp and crab. I ate that, since it was on my approved list. My problem is, I am very much a "if I don't like it, I just rather not eat." Yesterday, on my way home from work, I was starving and stopped at Chik Fil A to get some grilled chicken nuggets. Those were disgusting. I was so irritable yesterday.

Today, I am a little better. Still hungry. Really hungry.

Meanwhile, I just read in the news that Chris Christie, the governor of New Jersey, secretly had lap band surgery in February! That's cool!

As I said, tomorrow starts the liquid diet. Shouldn't be too hard, because for most of the day I will be at the hospital doing pre op paperwork and what not, and then class tomorrow night.

Did I mention I was hungry?

Saturday, May 4, 2013

I am sore and burnt

So far, I am sticking to the diet. We even went to our favorite place to eat for lunch and I had roasted chicken and green beans. We went to my in-laws so Willie could fix their computer, and I jumped in the tanning bed...a little too long.

We went a got the rest of my vitamins and some more supplies for the upcoming diet change. We also went to the gym for about 2 hours this evening. Willie cooked some veggies and shrimp, and it was actually pretty good.

We also weighed today... and I am already down 4lbs! Willie is down 6lbs!

I pray for strength to keep going.

Friday, May 3, 2013

Pre-Op Diet: Day One

So, here we go. The diet begins.

Yesterday we met with the personal trainer at Anytime Fitness. Great guy, very motivating. I felt like I was on an episode of the biggest loser. This "evaluation" was free. After we were done with our session came time to talk about the prices for his service. Drum roll.... $99 per person, per month and that's only one session a week. As much as I think it could be worth it, by bank account doesn't. Maybe when I am working in a law firm, or Willie get his raise, but not now. Looks like Willie & I will have to do it the old fashioned way. Luckily, the Zumba class I used to go to is on Thursdays, and night I haven't had free in over a year because of school. But this semester I get to go.

I tried to make an effort to get up early and cook me some eggs, but I straightened my hair instead. I won't be home again until about 11:00pm, so I ran out of time getting clothes together for job #2 this evening. Pictured is my breakfast. I brought another cottage cheese for lunch. This afternoon I can eat at my parent's restaurant, a chicken breast cooked in olive oil.

Starting weight: 298.6 (that is disgusting)

Thursday, May 2, 2013

My Husband

Last night, I weighed my self on the new scale. I was astonished. 297.6. WTF?! This is terrible, but only reaffirmed my belief that I need this surgery. I am so embarrassed. Today we meet with the personal trainer, and he will take my weight. I was really worried, because I did not want Willie to know how much I truly weigh. Yes, he is my husband, but it doesn't matter.

Well, last night he got on the scale. Around our wedding he weighed 250lb. Now, 296.4. WTF! I guess we both gained together.

But now we are getting our crap together!

He made me go to the gym. He ran a mile. Yes, ran. I did the eliptical for 10min, bike for 10 and walked for 10. It's a step.

Tomorrow we start!!!!

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Diet Confusion

My husband and I are going to go grocery shopping tonight or tomorrow, and I am trying to get a good list of food I can have during this process. As well as looking at me own list provided by the nutritionist, I am reading blogs, and the more I read, the more confused I get.

Problem #1: The pre-op liquid diet. I know protein is important, but I don't think I worry about that before the surgery...right? Just water (flavored), decaf tea/coffee, broths and juice if I feel week. And then directly after, it the same thing. When does the protein come in to the picture?

Problem #2: My guide says I can only have the above mentioned and jello and sugar free popsicles for the first week...what do I do about the protein? Do I worry about that when I go to mushies? Should I buy the powder? When do I start the protein drinks?

Hello? Is this thing on?

Problem #3: I have too much food in my house, and starting Friday, I can't eat hardly any of it. I need to have a dinner party tomorrow night to get rid of the junk!

On another note:
My husband and I are going to the gym today. I am dreading it already.